What two things could be more opposite right? It kinda sucks that both are being crammed into the same day for me. :P
Today (soon actually) I'll be going to see a counselor, courtesy of my mother and recent events that people apparently think I need counseling for. I really do not want to go speak to this woman. First of all, I have an utmost respect for counselors and psychiatrists, because I think what they do can help in ways that those who have never been in counseling can understand. HOWEVER, the office that I have to go to just so happens to be the same office I went to when I was about five years younger and was in a MUCH darker place. So I really dread going there because every time I even drive past that place I'm reminded of the past, which is not a place I like to frequently visit... I really have no clue what she even plans on speaking to me about because I. Am. Fine. I suppose I can only wait and see. Maybe she'll bring to light things I don't want to come to terms with myself, but I seriously doubt it since I have nothing of such sort to talk about.
Tonight I'll also be going Christmas shopping with Matt (my boyfriend) and his family. Most people hate to do that, but I love it. It's two of my favorite things phrased together. Christmas and shopping. Just my personal beliefs here, but I'm a Christian so Christmas to me is not just a time of getting whatever I want from family and friends. People actually consider me weird because I don't even like telling people what I want for Christmas. Maybe that is a little weird, but it makes me feel like an attention-whoring selfish little brat. Anyway, I like shopping for gifts for other people because it's a really good way to show someone you're thinking about them and that you love them. If you've never given a Christmas present, give it a shot this year. Giving results in a very good feeling that you'll never want to rid youself of.
So anyway, I'm not very happy about this situation because I feel like this counseling office thing may put a damper on my mood for shopping tonight. I'm going to try my best not to let it get that way, but I guess we'll see what happens. Hopefully it'll be fine and I won't leave there feeling like crap from all those old and bad memories.
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